How to Love...

Not every woman is brought up in a happy, healthy or loving home environment. Naturally, you grow and develop from the garden from which you were grown.

Growing up, some of my very best friends grew up having very little affection and encouragement at home and it led to a number of troubling factors. Some had low self-esteem. Some became promiscuous. Some found a way to distract themselves from the reality at home through other ventures. Drinking, drugs, etc.

For some women, they can't even fathom growing up without hugs, kisses and simply knowing someone loves them and cares about every little aspect of their life. But unfortunately, this is a reality for some and it does really affect your interaction with the people who mean the most to you throughout your life.

Some women go through life never truly knowing how to love.
Then one day they become a mother. They are suddenly overflowing with emotion. For most moms, this emotion is nothing other than an abundance of love and excitement, but for some, their emotion becomes anxiety and insecurity. They start to wonder,

"Am I going to be a good mom?"
"What if I fail?"
"What if I can't be everything my baby needs me to be?"
"What if I can't be the "IDEAL" Mom?"

I have news for you: There's no such thing. There's is no ideal mom. Every single mother on this planet goes through something at some point. "But she just makes it look so easy. She just looks like she's got it all together." Here's a dose of reality. The same mom that you admire, that you think you could never be like, is the same mom who broke into tears last week because she needed a break or she learned of yet another brick she had to add to the rest she already had on her back or she just drew her last straw (you know, the one that broke the camel's back?).

This image that celebrities, especially, try to convey to the media, the perfect mom, the together mom, the chic mom, 24/7, is all a show. Believe me! Think about it. A woman who has nannies, a beauty team, maids and every other help you can think to hire compared to a mom who does it all. It's a 100% guarantee that without the help, they would be just as tired, just as overworked and just as in Mommy-mode (hair up, no make up, scrubs on) as the rest of us!

I feel that one of the most important things us women need to know is that No matter how you were raised. No matter what you had or didn't have growing up. No matter what kind of mentality you were influenced to develop. YOU decide how your household will be run. YOU decide how much love and affection is shown in your family's life. YOU can change the course of the direction        your want your future to develop into. 

Remember...
You do not need money to show how much you love someone.
---We can all learn something from our babies. You give a baby a fancy toy, they'll go after the box it came in.
 
There is no limit to how much love and encouragement you can give to your family.
---You are the Queen of Hearts.
 
There are no excuses on why you can't love or show affection to your loved ones how you want to, no matter how you were raised.   
 ---You should be raising your children, therefore, experience and influence should have no factor on how you love your kids or your significant other or your other important people in your life.

Ultimately, YOU choose the type of mother you want to be. No Excuses.

You want to be a more creative mom? Do it! Pick up a book! Learn something! Put some effort into it!
You want to put more effort into your kids? Do it! Yes, you may get a little less sleep and be a little more tired at the end of the day, but it's worth it.
Wish you could be more affectionate to your loved ones? DO IT! There's nothing stopping your besides you!
Be the type of Mother you want to be so that you can be proud of the Mother you've become. Leave a legacy for your children remember.

I don't know about you, but I want my babies to remember Mommy did everything she could for us with every bit of her heart and she couldn't have given us more effort or love if she tried. 

That's the kind of mom I want to be.

What kind of Mom with you be remembered as?